Andrei Freeman (lordandrei) wrote,
Andrei Freeman

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Return of the evil s&#t. A new IM Conversation

This goes back to continue a thread from a crazed IM'er who decided to make me the target of his skewed survey.

I made a list of rules for contacting me via IM. It's sort of amusing to me the lack of need for this. The average person who this would apply to would neither read it nor follow it if they dared to read it.

Personally, I have the urge to add the following to the list.
Failure to read this list will result in you being taught a lesson in netiquette whether you want it or not.

Today's IM would normally have been ignored from line 1, but I was feeling expressly evil today

5:49:40    Buzz!!
Normally, a conversation with someone hitting the accursed 'buzz' button results in an immediate 'block.' But I was feeling feisty.
5:51:38    Let me guess. You're in Nigeria?
5:52:06    no i am from ohoin
Ohion? I have my suspicions here. But for some reason curiosity gets the best of me. I have to ask.
5:52:52    ohoin?
5:53:07    yes
5:53:15    Where is Ohoin?
5:53:38    in akron
It would be helpful to point out here that I went to college in Ohio. 5 years. It might also be amusing to point out that Ohio is in fact the shortest state name clocking in at a highly difficult to remember four letters. I realize this is hard to rememeber for some and also the fact of the relationship between a city and a state.
5:54:46    Do you, perhaps, mean Ohio?
5:55:05    yes
5:55:13    in akron
Someday, I will figure out why I begin the next exchange with 'No offense.' Because in all honesty at this point it was fully my intention to offend.
5:56:28    No offense, but since it is the shortest named state in the country, you might want to learn to spell it before you claim that you are from there. Further, you might want to learn your geography as Akron is a city in Ohio. No the other way around. So... I am going to assume that you are either not really from Ohio or that you are under the age of 13.
5:57:23    are u emberasing me or what
Ah, good. My extensive use of sentence structure has indicated that use of the internet 'u' would be appreciated by this Ohoinian.
If anyone can explain what this person was trying to get at here... um... no, never mind. I really don't want to know. I think somewhere around here I come to the realization (and express to SJ) that I'm actually enjoying this. I am getting the point to openly insult someone who will neither listen nor care. I probably won't make a dent.. but there will be no reprocussions. And anyway; the person so sorely deserves it.

6:00:16    That question makes no sense. I am pointing out that you have not given me any convincing reason to believe that you aren't yet another random spammer probably from Nigeria. You misspelled the easiest state name in the US and can't tell a city from a state. You buzzed to start a conversation and then resort to shortened spellings of 'u' despite the fact that I use full sentences and spelling. So.. you tell me.
6:00:23    Buzz!!
6:00:31    what did you wont from me
I start typing a long response...
6:00:23    i thing u said i am not good at english
6:02:17    What did I want? (note corrected spelling).. Nothing. I was minding my own business when you 'buzz'ed me. What "do" I want? Personally, I'd like you to log off the computer and not return to the internet until you've learned the language your using and some basic set of manners and etiquette. That being said.. What I want is irrelevant because random fly-by net spammers like you never, never.... ever... listen.
There is no response. Maybe they blocked me. Maybe they logged off. Did I win... Did I smite a spammer and clear the information super rush hour of a speed-bump? Oh I need to get in one last swipe!
6:06:23    So, you're either bored with my tirade or perhaps been seized with an amazing sense of dignity and reason and logged off. One can only hope, but this message is really just meant to bait you to see if you're still there.

Tags: im, spammer

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