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Andrei in the office


Andrei's Universe

One man's journey from infinity to nothingness

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Andrei in the office

You mean you haven't always been an Andrei?

With rarer occasion this topic comes up. I thought it might be best to summarize the history on this transition in my life in one place that I can access through the live journal memories.

Below are several LJ posts that consist of the year and half leading up to one of the most important changes in my life. A tangible legal change to my civil name. In truth, the change was pretty much a complete overhaul. The only item I retained was my middle initial. This is ironic because my civil middle name at birth was one of the things I spent the most effort rarely admitting to.

As I got closer to the point of deciding to actually make the change, I'd begun to realize that I'd been subconsciously making the change in an almost magickal sense over the years in preparation. The actual event almost became a confirmation of fact rather than a change to be made.

By the time these listed posts were made there was already some back-story and progress. the first post gives you about the history. Read them in order... That should sort things out :)

May 6, 2003
Read the section: Why is your name

Sept 12, 2003
Would you change your name

Nov 19, 2003
Training the mind

Sep 23, 2004
A journal change

Oct 7, 2004
The Full Transition

Edit 080714: Fixed the links to LJ's current style

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It's odd, i've known you for so long that when I was really upset, I used your old name. I felt bad about it for a while afterwards.

Adam is not a bad middle name..at least it's not Adolph..

"Does this look like the nose of a papal candidate?"

It was a nice monitor, while it lasted.

lordandrei, have you considered a career as a stand-up comedian?

I have in fact been asked that on more than one occassion...

Unfortunately, it tends to all just come out when I don't plan it. Much like a bad sneeze when a tissue is not around. (suddenly I'm finding my comedy grosser than it actually is)

I'm really not quite sure how to go about arranging it all.

I'm really not quite sure how to go about arranging it all.

Simple. Agree to do "five minutes of Thelemite stand-up" at the next NOTOCON. Nothing like a deadline to motivate.

I usually do five or ten minutes of Pagan Standup every year at Spring Mysteries.

Agree to do "five minutes of Thelemite stand-up" at the next NOTOCON.

Now that I would love to see!

Thank you! I have told the man the same a million times! Well, maybe 3.

I haven't always been a Brandy, either

Shockingly enough. Most Brandys are about ten years my junior. I love having changed my name legally and having it on my passport. All my books are in that name too which also helps.

chosen names are a good thing.

i am still waiting for a magickal name to come to me. so far, it hasn't. i hope i'll know it when i hear it.

It may not be *a* magickal name. Be open to the possibility of more than one, rather than being amongst those who change them every other month. I have at least 2-3 and another, Draco, that I use as a pen name for my art and have used for about 10 years. That was a chosen name. When I found one of my names I use for other applications, it was over a period of about/over 10 years. It started as one thing and evolved through similar variations, kind of like in movies where a character zones out and another character is calling their name, and they don't hear it, but as the third party viewer, you hear the sound effects of the name coming from a muddled noise, becoming clearer til you hear the name and the character snaps out of it. It was about 2 years ago when the name sounded itself clearly to me. Another is what I call one of my muses, Jackal, and has since attached itself to me like an attention-deprived cat . That was a development over a year. The others haven't really sat as still and some are variations of that first name. The entity/aspect from that first name has sub-aspects with different names, like taking on different roles and has evolved with me as I grew up. I think it just is a result of the fact that a fair handful of my deities are multi-aspect beings, such as the Mahavidyas....10 heads are better than 1. ;)

You may have better luck and find something that fits you, sooner. For me, much of it came from understanding my core self, who I was to myself and if there are/were changes to be made, what are/were they? Part of it is waiting. Part of it is researching your inner being. Draco was taken on as a child, by myself without much influence from others on name choice, to cure my shyness and lack of confidence that I resented not having. Keep in mind tho, that I'm female, not male, as a name like Draco, might imply. ;)

Good luck on your search!

thanks! that's good advice.

i actually do have a pen name that i'm very happy with. still waiting for something people can call me in circle, though. and i've been at this for the better part of ten years -- it's not like i haven't given it thought! :>

i just keep hoping the gods will clock me with it. at least i'd be sure it was the right one.

Hrm. Not always. Sometimes you have to ask very specifically. Some gods may be a little more direct, but mine certainly aren't amongst those. I think Kali may have been doing a vague equivalent to someone sitting a couple tables away from me in a bustling restaurant, harumphing at me for my attention and has periodically taken to throwing metaphorical peas or something across the tables at me, but I'm still trying to figure out what she's at and what she's trying to get through to me. I think it might be a positive thing tho, since, I think my muses may have been from her. Still, the visual of Kali in a restaurant, throwing peas at me is amusing. *lol*

that's interesting you should mention kali! the goddess i've been working with longest first gave her name as kali, although as i've developed my relationship with her i've come to think she's not quite the hindu kali (although studying kali worship in india gave me a lot of insight into this deity, who is also a mother/devourer). i usually find her to be very direct. i don't think i've ever specifically asked for a name, though. how silly of me!

now i have to figure out who to ask! i'm working with the gods of the anderson feri tradition right now, but they're still pretty new to me (with the exception of the star goddess, who was instantly familiar).

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