Log in

No account? Create an account
Andrei in the office


Andrei's Universe

One man's journey from infinity to nothingness

Previous Entry Share Flag Next Entry
Andrei in the office


I chose the title of this post in response to jnanacandra's last post. (Please note it's filtered, so many of you may not get that joke)

Well, I'm definitely married. Today I got to face something my wife does that I will have to get used to. She asked me to make her a roast beef sandwich. She asked for it on multi-grain bread, with pepper-jack white cheese... and Mayonaise!!!


Okay, I am not actively practicing Judaism, but this is hundreds... no thousands of years of culture and tradition.

It's very simple:
Mayo goes on turkey
Ketchup goes on Roast Beef
Mustard goes on Ham. (um... if we were to eat ham... tra-la-la, nothing-nothing-nothing;... nothing to see, move along.

Okay, I'll admit it... I already let one Scot introduce me to the Eeeeevuullllss of mustard on roast beast.

But there are limits...

Mayo on Roast Beef? No, no... no, no-no-no.

I must edjumicate her ;)

(Have I mentioned how much in love I am :?)

I should know better than to post: This is the way of the world. It always results in long threads.

Come on people, You must learn to put a proper condiment on a proper meat in the proper meal!

  • 1
says he who eats mayo on french fries.

Blame that on the Dutch!

But, yes.. Guilty as charged ;)

Sorry man, but mayo and hot sauce go on roast beef. Or maybe horseradish which I would not mix with ketchup unlesss making shrimp sauce.

So there ya go.

that sounds interesting. I'd try that.

but mayo? not on RB. I just can't do it.

Hee! You said "edjumicate"!

That's the way that I was learn'd it.

According to my wife (gf_guruilla), mustard goes on pastrami, corned beef, or tongue.

We're talking a four-alarm-deli-frequenter here.

Listen up folks.. She's a professional. This woman knows were to find good Borscht!


Admittedly, I have never liked any of those meats.

It could be worse...

In two words... "miracle whip"

Re: It could be worse...

To be honest, as chite points out... I have a penchant for using mayo on fries. In fact fritesaus (I think that's the spelling) is a topping about halfway between helmann's mayo and M.W.

It's actually quite good. Despite the weirdness factor to everyone.

You also forgot:

Mustard goes on corned beef, and pastrami.

Turkey can also get Russian Dressing, which is Mayo PLUS STUFF.

Ham is the only meat that can be eaten with cheese.

There are RULES, DAMMIT.

(and one of them is that Ketchup goes on Fries. Freak.)

See, now here is what an upbringing in Canarsie is for. It teaches you proper meat etiquette.


Dr. Browns has one and only one soda worth drinking. It is Vanilla Cream.

Celery Soda? And I'm a Freak? ;)

You know, speaking as a recovering Jew myself, I have to say that I'm shocked. Everyone knows that mayo is strictly for the goyim and mustard goes on everything. Sheesh. :)

Well, yes There is that.

But I think that's more Orthodox Dining.

I was raised in more of a Hassidic, Reformed Conservadox household.

I still don't understand why someone would put chocolate syrup on chocolate ice cream. It's too much of one flavor. It's too much of one flavor. Now strawberry syrup on chocolate ice cream is good, and chocolate syrup on strawberry ice cream is good...

Now that's a whole other ball of wax.

Vanilla ice cream goes with chocolate syrup or hot fudge
Chocolate ice cream goes with marshmallow fluff

Strawberry ice cream goes by itself, because it is the perfect ice cream and does not need anything else.

As long as it's not catsup (or ketchup.. whichever) I'm easy. Just say NO to the Smooth Red Food Group.

(Deleted comment)
I think mayo is gross. I recall a ghost story of my youth , starring mysterious jars of mayo showing up in a refridgerator, and finally the heroine of the story catching her dead husband oozing pus into jars and putting them into the fridge. If it comes on a sandwich, I use the pickles or a napkin to scrape it off. Except on artichokes. then it's necessary.

Mayo and roast beef go so WELL together! I love to eat it that way. :-)

I don't use any condiments on anything. (Note: anything normally served on ice cream does not count as a condiment.)

I'll eat cheese with anything.

  • 1