Andrei in the office

lordandrei

Andrei's Universe

One man's journey from infinity to nothingness


Andrei in the office
lordandrei

Notes.... Part 1

I've come to the conclusion there are some things that I really need to post about. These are topics that are harder for me to post about.
This is long, cut for politenessCollapse )

Andrei in the office
lordandrei

I am manly man!

I am big sweaty manly-man right now. To ain in trying to get into shape and to extend my burgeoning love of the sport of football, I have joined one of the football teams on our work plaza's inter-company flag football league.

Symantec (my company) has four teams out of the seven playing. Needless to say...there's a little rivalry.

One team has players from neighboring divisions in the company. There has been a lot of 'trash talking' over the last few weeks as our games kept getting rescheduled due to rain.

Today...we beat them. I believe it was 4-1 though it may have only been 3-1. None the less...We won.

My job is to rush the QB. For those of you who don't understand the sport, I will explain quickly. The QB is the guy who tries to throw, give, or keep the ball so that someone will get it to the other end of the field and get a score. The other side would prefer to mess the QB up as much as possible to prevent him from doing this. My job is to run at the QB like a spaz and either psych him out or get teh ball away from him (this is flag football, so I'm only allowed to either block a throw or grab a flag from his belt)

The ball starts at a point (called the line of scrimmage) and is tossed back about a yard or so to the QB so he can have some room to maneuver. In our rules he can not throw the ball if he gets in front of the line of scrimmage.

Today I was able to break up several attempts to throw the ball. Today I also got the pleasure of forcing the QB to throw the ball past the line, which got them a penalty and forced them backwards on the field.


Of course the downside when you're a QB rusher is that you have only one thought on your mind. Get at the guy with the ball.

I had one play go almost very badly awry. I managed to screw up the QB so badly that he threw the ball very wildly and he actually wound up passing it to one of our guys. (this is an interception; a very good thing for the team that intercepts the ball)

Unfortunately, I hadn't seen this guy on our team before. I've been out for 3 weeks due to my illness. I broke up the pass and then saw a guy coming at me with the ball. I went for him. Just before grabbing the ball, something in my head clicked and said, "Moron, he has a black shirt...You have a black shirt...they have white shirts"

I fell backwards (blocking someone trying to get at (Oh, yeah my) teammate and yelled, "What the fuck am I doing? He's on my team"

For those that understand football. I broke up the play on the 25, we intercepted at the 35, I managed to not tackle him on the 30 but unknowingly got a nice block in and he was brought down at their 5.

So we beat our co-workers team....

...and now we hope they aren't sad losers and we hope that our internet connection doesn't go *$(&ack
*3(C
sdasd
TCP/IP connection dropped.

Andrei in the office
lordandrei

The car, the cop, and the contriband

To get back from work today, a brother in the order gave me a lift. This should have gone smoothly. Well, put more than 2 order members in the car...and things will often get silly...

We stopped off for dinner, this was cool. Had a great burger. Dropped off one of the brothers...headed for my place.

Then it hit... Passing not one, but two flashing blue light cops, the driver felt it best to slow a bit. Apparently, since it was the 30th... this didn't matter.

Motorcycle cop lights on... waves us over.

Okay. We pull over...both wearing seat belts...check.

"Can I see your license...yadda yadda yadda."

Driver goes rummaging through glove box for papers. Cop wanders off. He leans over to me
"I didn't want him looking in the glove box, because I have a small pocket knife in there, and I want this to go as quickly as possible. Could you make sure it's covered. I move some papers around and spy the following

I figure...I might as well cover that up as well. It's probably in the driver's best interest...especially if he's worried about a pocket knife.

The cop gives him a ticket for not stopping for an imaginary pedestrian who was theoretically halfway into a crosswalk that also doesn't exist. (In reflection...maybe I should have given the cop what I found.. Obviously he had several of his own.)

We get back to my place. The driver is not happy being ticketed. I say, Well, I covered the pocket knife and figured I should cover the 'pipe' as well. My friend .... bleached.
"What pipe?"
"The pipe in the glove compartment"
"I don't have a pipe in the glove comptment. I wouldn't put a pipe in the glove compartment, especially for the reason we just had.."

He excuses himself to examine the contraband and try to deduce which of his "friends" he might have to kill.

Five minutes later he returns to my apartment simply saying, "You son of a bitch..."

The punch lineCollapse )

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