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Andrei in the office


Andrei's Universe

One man's journey from infinity to nothingness

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Andrei in the office

IM'ing du jour

This is today's flyby IM'ing. I have a standard rule. If I get messaged by someone that is most likely a "HNG" horny net geek, I have taken it on myself to try to (in the vain hope) educate them. Today's hng du jour, whom I aptly renamed dujour, had a yahoo profile that described him as a 34 yr old male who's about me includes: "all cultural events goatee men latinos caucasions hairy men"

I suppose I should be pleased that I fall into some class of "Ooh, I love that type." But like everyone else... You know.. some sense of tact would be nice. I've added my thought processes in italics.

DU_JOUR [12:16:23 PM]: hi
YHOO_ME [12:16:31 PM]: Hello Oh, gods... a new stranger
DU_JOUR [12:16:42 PM]: how are you doing
YHOO_ME [12:16:55 PM]: Good cordial
YHOO_ME [12:17:07 PM]: You?
DU_JOUR [12:17:12 PM]: you in Sherman Oaks? That didn't take long... Do I know this person, or should I be scared?
DU_JOUR [12:17:16 PM]: me good too thanks
YHOO_ME [12:17:35 PM]: Um, I was.. Have we met?
DU_JOUR [12:17:43 PM]: no
DU_JOUR [12:17:50 PM]: just checked out your homepage My homepage is mostly blank and under construction. Yahoo profile maybe
DU_JOUR [12:18:01 PM]: you bi? Whoop whoop, HNG alert! Whoop whoop, HNG alert
YHOO_ME [12:18:13 PM]: somewhat. Yes, this is misleading... but not altogether dishonest
DU_JOUR [12:18:19 PM]: into massage
YHOO_ME [12:18:42 PM]: depends on the person...
DU_JOUR [12:18:48 PM]: oh
YHOO_ME [12:19:36 PM]: Just sort of taken back by, "Hi. You in Sherman Oaks" It's a bit forward, wouldn't you say?
DU_JOUR [12:20:17 PM]: my apologies
DU_JOUR [12:20:53 PM]: didnt mean to offend you Oh my? A glimmer of hope?
YHOO_ME [12:21:11 PM]: Appreciated. I just tend to get the occassional message of "Hi, are you bi" and well... it's surprising. It just seems like in a bar that'd be a bit much, eh :?)
DU_JOUR [12:21:45 PM]: agree
DU_JOUR [12:21:55 PM]: should be more considerate
DU_JOUR [12:23:06 PM]: don't normally know how to talk with people who
DU_JOUR [12:23:10 PM]: I dont know well
DU_JOUR [12:23:15 PM]: or for the first time
DU_JOUR [12:23:26 PM]: also it must be language barrier
YHOO_ME [12:23:38 PM]: I figure.. whatever would work in a bar or in public is good for online. It's just another medium.
DU_JOUR [12:23:55 PM]: yeah
YHOO_ME [12:24:35 PM]: You get these 22 year olds who message with "MORF" (male or female) I mean really, would you walk up to someone cute in a bar and yell in their face, "MALE OR FEMALE?" Oh, yeah. this person is dreaming of a night with you now. ;)
DU_JOUR [12:25:42 PM]: :) Return smile, that means they either get it or think I'm warming up to them
YHOO_ME [12:26:24 PM]: Be right back. Need to reboot. Feel free to message again in about 5 minutes. No really, software install
DU_JOUR [12:26:29 PM]: k

At this point I rebooted. I logged back and almost immediately...

DU_JOUR [12:43:47 PM]: hi you back?
YHOO_ME [12:44:03 PM]: just now, yes
DU_JOUR [12:44:15 PM]: can you talk a bit or you busy?
YHOO_ME [12:44:46 PM]: *heh* a little of both
DU_JOUR [12:45:36 PM]: I was just wondering if you can give or exchange massage Picture the sound of a dying pacman
YHOO_ME [12:46:13 PM]: exchange? Not sure what you mean by 'exchanging' massage.
DU_JOUR [12:46:39 PM]: or you give me a massageagain
YHOO_ME [12:47:22 PM]: So we have returned to forward then.
DU_JOUR [12:47:44 PM]: huh?
DU_JOUR [12:47:51 PM]: dont understand you
YHOO_ME [12:48:43 PM]: I give massages. I like receiving massages. Neither do I do in a private atmosphere unless it's a professional transaction for them or else I know the person.
DU_JOUR [12:50:44 PM]: professional transaction means you charge money?
YHOO_ME [12:51:25 PM]: If I'm paying for a masseus or if I'm charging for my time. Sometimes I do it for friends for free. If it's more 'personal' it's with someone I know Okay, okay.. I too have been a letch. But I at least have sen the person and talked to them before offering a back rub
DU_JOUR [12:52:51 PM]: ic
DU_JOUR [12:53:13 PM]: ok
DU_JOUR [12:54:16 PM]: I am not someone you know, so it can't be personal
DU_JOUR [12:54:36 PM]: I am not your friend, so you dont do it for free
YHOO_ME [12:54:40 PM]: Thus my answer to "or you give me a massage"
DU_JOUR [12:54:57 PM]: k
YHOO_ME [12:56:45 PM]: I figure... anyone I'm intersted in is gonna try to get to know me before asking about my sexual proclivities and such. Just because I say, "Hey... I like sex" doesn't mean "Come and get me boys... (Or insert your choice gender)"
DU_JOUR [12:57:54 PM]: ok
YHOO_ME [12:58:04 PM]: Make sense?
DU_JOUR [12:58:08 PM]: sure
YHOO_ME [1:02:29 PM]: so.... ?
DU_JOUR [1:02:41 PM]: what do you mean
DU_JOUR [1:03:03 PM]: I am tired and I need a massage
DU_JOUR [1:03:15 PM]: dont think I have the money to pay if you wanna charge
YHOO_ME [1:03:39 PM]: Ah. I see... Well, good luck then.
DU_JOUR [1:03:44 PM]: thanks
DU_JOUR [1:03:46 PM]: you too

And I blocked him. *sigh* this one almost sounded like he might get it.