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Andrei's Universe - Short and sweet... but this is nice.
One man's journey from infinity to nothingness
lordandrei
[info]lordandrei
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Short and sweet... but this is nice.
At work we have mannnnny cafeterieas with a wide selection of food stuffs.

Today I had Asian-like chicken over not to ruined rice.
hey, I was raised Jewish. I'm supposed to be snobby about "Chinese" food

When they serve Asian food they offer fortune cookies.

Sadly in most restaurants they have been reduced down to "poor-grammar statement" cookies rather than an actual "fortune" cookies.

Nonetheless....
I have a tradition about fortune cookies.
No matter how good or bad the cookie is; I eat it in its entirety before reading the fortune.

It's my little tradition. I figure by holding back I actually push away complete ambivelence and energize the probability field around the fortune.

This is my tradition... you may scoff, mock, chuckle all you want.

So today I got a cookie and merily munched.

Energized I hoped that I had a fortune worth keeping and looked down. A got a really zen like smile on my face:

You will have much to be thankful for in the coming year.

Yay. :)

And for those who haven't heard the story by now. I no longer ever add the words, "in bed" to my fortunes.

Oh,sure...it was funny in college. But once... long ago.. the day I stopped having this kind of fun... came the "In bed"-killer of allllllll fortunes:
My scrap of paper read: "You have a special and unique way with children."

Eww. ew ew ew ew ew ew. Ick.

No more in bed.

Just much to be thankful for :)

Tags: , ,
Current Location: Office
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: NiN playing in my head.

16 expressions or perhaps, perhaps, perhaps... Elucidate as you will
Comments
cahwyguy From: [info]cahwyguy Date: July 14th, 2006 08:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
You have a special and unique way with children

Uhh, that would stop me from adding it as well. Oo! Ick!
docscarabus From: [info]docscarabus Date: July 14th, 2006 08:38 pm (UTC) (Link)
You should read the fortune first. By eating the cookie you accept the fortune. What if you get a bad fortune?? You've already eaten the cookie! You're fucked!

What if your fortune is "you will slow roasted over a fire by Bob Sagget"?

Can't you just see Bob stoking the fire, saying "You ate the cookie! I didn't make you eat the cookie!"
Screened comment Expand
lordandrei From: [info]lordandrei Date: July 14th, 2006 09:25 pm (UTC) (Link)

It is odd

I have read all your requests and responded to them. It would seem the problem is not me receiving. I think you may be having a filter losing mine. Please tell me if you get this comment back.
isomeme From: [info]isomeme Date: July 14th, 2006 09:51 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: It is odd

Got it. Now try an email, please...

(And yes, this is quite weird indeed.)
princekermit From: [info]princekermit Date: July 14th, 2006 08:56 pm (UTC) (Link)
You know, frankly, for the number of Chinese people they have working there, that the Chinese food would be better.

Yay for the thankfulness
Ouch on the children fortune.
I'll still trade that one for this: http://tinyurl.com/djbsj

lordandrei From: [info]lordandrei Date: July 14th, 2006 09:21 pm (UTC) (Link)

Oh that's wonderful

Or horrible

Or horrifying

In the words of Robert at EotC: "I Lovvvve IT!"
gwywnnydd From: [info]gwywnnydd Date: July 14th, 2006 08:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Please contact Cheryl about a replacement keyboard for my workstation. I can save the monitor.

It's your fault it's now wearing clam chowder... EW. Yeah, no more with the funny endings...
wednes From: [info]wednes Date: July 14th, 2006 09:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
I have nothing witty to add, but had to mention what a delightful read that was.
usumcasane From: [info]usumcasane Date: July 14th, 2006 09:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, I eat the cookie first, before reading the fortune. I read somewhere that this was the way one made the fortune happen.

Others scoff at this behavior of mine. Glad I am not completely alone.
happysteve From: [info]happysteve Date: July 14th, 2006 09:12 pm (UTC) (Link)
My scrap of paper read: "You have a special and unique way with children."

Saved to LJ Memories. Thanks for the laughs!
operagal From: [info]operagal Date: July 14th, 2006 09:23 pm (UTC) (Link)
I'm lauging like a banshee. Thanks for a great ending to a horrid week! :)
ithisia From: [info]ithisia Date: July 14th, 2006 09:53 pm (UTC) (Link)

Am I

Am I the only one who never found the "in bed," joke funny?
lol - I just thought it was stupid.
:D

People would do it and I'd be like. "Like we've never heard that stupid addition before," in my head.
:)

SNOB. I'ma SNOB>@()%&*)@(

Jk.

Anywho. that issss all.

-Angela
lazuli93 From: [info]lazuli93 Date: July 14th, 2006 10:16 pm (UTC) (Link)
I usually eat the cookie first as well!

As for the add on game, I first learned that with the phrase "between the sheets", which I think is so much more poetic. Ever since then when I hear "in bed" I wince internally because it just doesn't flow right for me.

Now that you have told me about the children thing, I think I'll probably have to stop as well. Your story will likely stick.
ts4z From: [info]ts4z Date: July 15th, 2006 01:56 am (UTC) (Link)
I once got the fortune "Constant grinding will turn an iron rod into a needle."

But you still win.